It seems that people find everything online. They find second-hand furniture online. They get their news online. They buy chocolate and dog collars and used cars online. Some people even find love online.
But should you find a surrogate mother online?
As with so many things, the answer is, “It depends”.
When you go online, you face a number of risks. A huge risk is finding a surrogate mother on your own. Most people have no way of assessing a potential surrogate mother. If you are a doctor and your spouse is a detective, you will stand a better chance than most, as you will see by our list of criteria below. But there is still a lot you will miss if you are not familiar with the process.
That’s why most couples turn to an agency. An agency knows what to look for and how to look. We screen potential surrogates for a fairly long laundry list of factors.
Be careful. Going online to find an agency reduces your risk, but make sure the agency screens potential surrogates as carefully as Creative Love does here in Florida.
Here are some of the ways that we bring your risk of finding a surrogate online to almost zero:
We do a criminal background check.
We make sure the surrogate is a citizen or a permanent resident – somebody who will not be facing the stress of deportation hearings during the pregnancy. This is also an important step to protect you from possible legal complications. For the same reason, we verify that surrogates we work with are legal residents of surrogate friendly states.
We do a complete psychological assessment. We do an in-home interview with the whole family. We send a licensed social worker to the home, as well. From experience, we can attest to the importance of having the whole family on board, not just the mother. This is something people often overlook when contracting privately with a surrogate they find online.
We also make sure that the surrogate has had at least one previous pregnancy and that she is currently an active mother (oh, the risks that you might not realize if you hire a surrogate who is not currently raising at least one child!) Very important, we check that all previous pregnancies were carried to term with a live birth, and that she has not had more than four pregnancies.
It stands to reason that we do complete physical checkups, to make sure that any surrogate we work with is in top physical and medical condition.
Be very careful also about motivation. If a person is offering their surrogacy services online, is it because she is hoping to make more than an agency will pay her? If so, your surrogate is motivated more by money than by the joy of pregnancy or by altruism. That is one reason why we also check their financial status, and we simply refuse anybody on social assistance. Money is always a nice incentive, but it’s a dangerous primary motivation.
A careful woman, the type you want carrying your child, will go through a reputable agency, because she’ll be cautious about whom she meets online.
Craigslist and Facebook are fine for finding used furniture for your basement and gift baskets for special occasions. But the legal, emotional, financial and other risks of finding a surrogate mother online on your own, without the help of an experienced agency, are monumental. In the end, they could cost you more than going through an agency…especially if a legal complication results.Return to Blog