Why I became an Egg Donor…………………
Growing up without two parents was pretty much the norm in my neighborhood. In fact, at my elementary school, you were an outlier if you had two parents at home. My parents divorced before I started Kindergarten, and even though my brother and I might see our dad for an afternoon or two a couple of times a year, growing up it was mostly just the three of us: Me, my little brother, and Mother.
A lot of my friends complained about being latch-key kids, their single mom or dad gone long hours at work or out exploring less noble pursuits. But my brother and I would come home from school every day to find a healthy snack already prepped lovingly fro us in the fridge, and that yes, we really needed to finish all of the carrot sticks before we raided the package of cookies in the pantry. She caught in to our tricks pretty quickly and always knew to check the trashcan when she got home to see if we had just hidden them in there instead.
Monday through Friday, at 4:00 on the dot, about a half an hour after the bus dropped us off, Mom would call to tell us that break time was over; it was time to turn off the TV and start our homework. When she got home, sometimes with a pizza from the place on the corner or a bag of groceries so the three of us could make something together for dinner, she’d check our homework and help us pack tomorrow’s lunches. Then we were free for the rest of the night to destroy the basement with a tornado of Barbie dolls and nerf guns or whatever favorite toys we were currently obsessing over.
Every weekend, Mom sacrificed the little free time she had to make up for being away from is throughout the week. We’d ride our bikes up the street to the playground, visit the neighborhood pool, or – our favorite – go to the dollar store so we could spend the few bucks she gave us each week in exchange for our chores. Until my brother and I were both in high school and craved our independence, filling our weekends with our own plans and friends, I can remember my mom getting dolled up to go on a date or get dinner with her girlfriends less times than I can count on on hand.
We were her whole world. She told us all the time, something we sighed and rolled our eyes at until years later, when we were finally old to appreciate the value of her love. But she didn’t have to tell us, because she showed us every day. There were strict rules in our house, but she hardly ever yelled. When we were in trouble, we didn’t hide it from her, we went to her straight away because we knew she was our ally. (Even though that never really stopped us from getting grounded.)
Once I graduated high school I started college at the local community school. I always did very well in school, but wanted to stay closer to home to be with my mother and also work part-time. I wanted to give back to my mother for always being so giving to my little brother and I. In my junior year of college a good friend of mine had told me about her journey as an egg donor. I thought, “what a rewarding feeling”. I did a lot of research on the topic and discussed it with my mother at length. To know that I could help a couple or individual struggling to have a family and remain anonymous at the same time was something that interest me. I was not opposed to donate to a same-sex-couple. I was interested in helping someone that needed me. At the same time I could earn nice compensation to pay down my student loans.
After going through all of the medical screening and deemed accepted to become an egg donor I was ready. I knew through all of the screening that my future fertility was protected and I had plenty of eggs to share. I know still being a college student I’m not ready yet to make my mom a grandma, though she never misses a chance to remind me that she’s ready to be one. I think my future kids will be lucky if I turn out to be even half the mom she is. And I know there are individuals just like her – burning up with love to give to their children. This is why I chose to donate my eggs – because of my mom more then the compensation. She’s great, and I can’t imagine a bigger gift than giving someone else a chance to be that kind of mother too.Return to Blog