There comes a time in most people’s lives, both men and women, when young hearts turn to…baby making. Yes, the maternal and paternal instinct kicks in, and most couples decide they want to have a baby.
For thousands of generations, Mother Nature showed us how to make babies, and most of the time that proved successful.
But every now and then, there are problems. Every now and then, a couple simply cannot conceive.
In some cases, it is the result of a birth defect. In other cases, it is the result of an injury. In some other cases, it is simply a case of biological incompatibility.
In other cases, it might be because it is a same-sex couple.
And in some cases, it might just be a question of age. As a couple gets older, there are increased risks of miscarriage, autism and other complications.
Sometimes, it is the mother who is infertile. Sometimes, it is the father. Whichever it is, a couple who has been trying without success faces three choices.
They could give up on becoming parents and accept their fate as a free-wheeling couple without parental responsibilities. That was often the path chosen in days of yore.
They could adopt a child. After all, this is a great way to give love to a child that really needs it. Even in olden days, this was an option. There were no government agencies back then, but many parents died of disease while their children were still young, leaving a plethora of orphans to care for.
These days, there is a third choice: surrogacy. We have learned how to harness nature’s talents and bypass the defects that might prevent some parents from having children. There is egg donation and there is surrogacy. The question to ask is: “Is surrogacy right for us?”
A large part of this question is whether you can rule out the other options – remaining childless or adopting. If you are emotionally or psychologically tied to the notion that you need children of your own bloodline, then surrogacy is for you.
Surrogacy might be your only satisfying option, but here are a few vital questions to ask before determining that surrogacy is right for you:
Are you good at sharing? You’ll be sharing that parenting role for the first nine month’s of your baby’s life. In fact, you’ll be playing second fiddle until the birth. Are you OK with that?
Is the creation process important to you? If knowing that you’ve created the baby and feeling your baby bump are critical to your satisfaction, you might find surrogacy falls short of your expectations.
Can you afford it? Yes, that is usually a big factor. There are a lot of extra expenses that go into hiring a surrogate mother. You will probably have to pay the surrogate. There are medical expenses. There are legal expenses. They really do add up. Surrogacy is not an option for a low-income couple.